Free Green Play

Black Tusk Hike

Here’s a play I wrote for my grade 4/5 class two years ago.  We filmed it for a school assembly to introduce food scraps going into the green bin.  If you like it, print it off and change the details of how your city processes food scraps or puts its waste.

 PJ Sarah Collins

Vancouver Update: 

Set: News station

Cast:  News Anchors:  Emma and  Riley (competitive rivals)

Correspondent: Elena (impatient to make it big)

Producer: Matthew (hot pot ready to boil)

Producer’s Assistant: Joshua (peacemaker production assistant)

Special Guest:  Ruby (serious author chef)


[Opening shot of Riley’s face]

Riley:  (face in camera frame, tapping microphone)  Is this thing on?

Emma: (attaching headpiece and sitting down at desk) I can hear you (under breath, to audience) unfortunately.

Riley: Hairspray. Heard that.

Joshua: (moves efficiently to put last minute details into place.)

Emma: (sitting straight in her chair, adjusting papers)  Good!  So now you know what I really think of you.

Elena: (entering studio behind Anchors, also getting ready.) Right.  Cause you’d never talk behind someone’s back.

Emma: (smiling sweetly, while still facing ahead) No.  That’s your job. 

Joshua: (brushes the faces of the three reporter with a make-up brush, attempts to comb stray hairs in place.  Main focus of attention is Emma.)

Elena: Ha!  Global TV wants me…

Riley: As a Latte-girl.

Elena:  Where did you hear that? (mouth open, tries to respond, looks for an ally, centre stage behind anchors)

(Enter producer – left)

Mathew: Will you three cut it out?  I’m a babysitter, now.  Do you see what I’ve

Joshua: How’s today’s show looking?

Matthew: Ellen will be doing a segment from the dump, and we have Ruby Olson in to promote her new book, Waste-Free Cooking.

Elena: My job stinks.

Joshua: (Hands both Anchors their coffee.)

Elena: (reaches for a cup too, but Joshua is focused on making sure Emma is all set.)

Emma: (Hands Joshua her coffee).  Throw this out.  It’s too hot. What is Waste Free Cooking anyway?

(Joshua: grimaces but takes the cup away.)

Matthew:  It’s all in your notes.  It’s cooking without throwing anything

Riley: (looks confused, tries to organize his papers).

Emma: Yeah, right.  That’s not possible with my kids.

Elena: When I cook, it’s like an explosion hit my place. Take-out is more sanitary.

Matthew: Try to avoid these side comments, people – for the sake of our ratings
– And please, please, stick to your teleprompters.

Joshua: We’re live in 10…9… 8…

[Cue opening music]

Emma: Good Morning.  And welcome to another edition of Vancouver Update.  I’m your host Emma Elliott.   Today we’ll be interviewing author and chef
Ruby Olson, but first, our top story from Riley Knight:

Riley: Vancouver steps up in the Zero Waste Challenge.  Residents can now put kitchen green waste into their curbside bins.  For more on this story, we go to Elena King, our junior correspondent.

Elena: Thank you, Emma.  I’m at the Transfer Station here in South
Vancouver where garbage from Vancouver homes is collected from the curbside. Garbage is then loaded onto train cars and transported more than 300 kilometres to Cache Creek where it is dumped in a landfill.  But by adding kitchen waste into green bins, residents can help reduce waste by more than 25% and make soil. Back to you Emma.

Emma: Thanks, Elena.  I’d do the Kitchen Waste thing, but I don’t like it when my bins smell.

Riley: I hate all the extra mosquitoes.

[Commercial Music]

Joshua: (Comes onto set with a jug of water and some glasses.  Blots Emma and Riley’s
face with a tissue.)

Matthew: (stressed)  Those are just fruit flies… (turns to Riley) and they’re not going to bite! And what do you expect, Princess? (turning to Emma)  Of course bins might smell – if you don’t rinse them out occasionally!  People – stick to what is on the teleprompter!  I beg you!

Joshua: (Counting down again)  5, 4, 3, 2, 1

Emma: Welcome back.  To recap, the City of Vancouver is encouraging residents to cut down on 25% of garbage to beautiful Cache Creek by
composting or putting their food waste into their green bins.  

Riley:   The food waste, in addition to the yard clippings is made into soil by Richmond Soil and Fibre in just 9 amazing weeks!  And now to Elena, who is back from her field trip to introduce today’s guest.

[Studio change: Table with flowers, cooking ingredients, Ruby’s books, all laid out like a cooking show]

Elena: (standing next to Ruby) Thanks Ryan.  I’m here with Ruby Olson, chef
and author of Waste-Free Cooking to promote her new book.  Welcome Ruby!

Ruby:    Thank you.  I’m delighted to be here.  (holds her book, big smile)

Elena:  So tell us how you got the idea for Waste-Free Cooking?

Ruby:  Well, when Vancouver launched their Kitchen Waste program, I realized how it was possible to cook for my family with very little going into the garbage can.  And since I like a challenge, I decided to write some recipes with NOTHING going into the garbage. 

Elena: (laughs) Except for the stuff you burn, right?

Ruby:  (confused) What?  (Looks off camera to the producer)

Emma: (entering stage right)  Or them stuff your kids won’t eat.  I’ve got one kid that won’t touch vegetables, and another who will only eats beige foods….

Ruby: (recovering)  Well, let me show you how it’s possible, even with the picky eaters. (Camera close up of table, food, etc.) (Ruby points at the food as she talks.) Here’s a recipe I call  “Chunky Salad.”  I chop up some carrots, cucumber, tomato, mango, herbs… add it together with a bit of dressing, and it’s ready to
go.  And look!  It’s waste free.  The peelings go into the green bin, and when
I shopped for the vegetables, I used my bin, not plastic bags. 

Emma: Uh.  My kids won’t eat that.

Ruby: They might if it was all fruit.  (Show. Add a dollop of yogurt.)

Ryan: Her kids only like noodles.

Ruby:  I came prepared for that.  (Shot of counter top with prepared food).  Here’s my recipe for marinara pasta. I chopped up some tomatoes and zucchini, roasted it in a pan, made it smooth in the blender to hide the vegetables, and voila!   Something for everyone – even your beige eaters. And again, the best part is that my spaghetti box and tin can go into the blue bin, and my vegetable peels go into the green bin.

Elena: I get it now.  This makes sense.  (Pause) I understand you’re working on a new book. What’s that called?

Ruby: (picking  up her book)  Guilt-Free Gardening.

Riley: You’re so funny.  Like guilt-free because you cover your lawn with concrete and rocks?

Ruby: (confused again)  No. (Looking off camera at producer)  It’s gardening without pesticides….

[Jerk to commercial music]

(Matthew enters and chases after Ruby)  (Joshua enters to fuss about the set).

Matthew:[to Ruby] I’m so sorry… about the three of them not using their scripts… They get bored.  I have to give them creative freedom.

Ruby:  (tearing off her apron and storming off. She remembers her books, retrieves them, and exits)

Joshua: (worried) Ryan?  Emma? Can you land the show? In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…


Riley :  From all of us here at Vancouver Update…

Emma:  Good Bye. (waves and adjusts papers)

[End music]


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